Saturday, December 11, 2010

Sleep...less?

Last week I was trying to remember that Shakespeare quote about sleep...I know, I know there is that giant data base in the sky that I could go look for something instantly but it is more challenging to try to retrieve something from my mind that wasn't important when I learned/read it but now is of utmost importance...and then... there on Karen Michel's ETSY page, were the exact lines I was looking for... along with a gorgeous print...

Sleep that knits up the raveled sleeve of care
The death of each day's life, sore labour's bath
Balm of hurt minds, great nature's second course,
Chief nourisher in life's feast.
~William Shakespeare, Macbeth

I am not a good sleeper...never have been. Don't know why. The descriptive phrase my daddy used for my sleep habits was piss poor. I wake up every morning at 2:22. Have for as long as I can remember. I usually go back to sleep, but when I don't, I have all these things that go through my head...did I leave something undone? Can I fix it right now? I've gotten better about letting go of things and trying to go back to sleep...I do have to be at work at 8 regardless of the amount of rest I got. But I am not always successful...

Sometimes things seem just beyond where I can retrieve them... just on the other side of the veil or hidden by a curtain that I can't quite draw. I've tried the "leaving a notebook by my bed so I can write down what I am thinking about" thing... to deal with it later but mostly in the morning it said things like "Uncle Bernie" (I don't have an Uncle Bernie) or high yellow...or something of equal importance. And really, that never helped anyway. I've tried teas, herbal remedies, lucid dreaming techniques...not quite ready for real drugs, still want to be in control I guess. I don't think it bothers me as much as it bothers others that I don't sleep much. Four hours a night is about my average and I am almost groggy all day if I get 8 hours. Just the way I am..but could the world stand it if 8 hours made me more amazing than I already am? ha!

Wouldn't it be nice if a simple STOP could turn off those thoughts? Fortunately these days there are folks on line at 2:22 in the morning so conversations can be had, ideas can be tossed around and it isn't so sucky. A friend is traveling and is sometimes 8 hours ahead, sometimes 7 so it's day there and I can get a update and find out fascinating things about faraway places with strange sounding names...

I know that it sometimes just one of those hot blasts...but it does give me some reflection time...and while I've always known that control is an illusion...I'm being to believe so is sleep...

What do you do to help you sleep?

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Try and keep up with my kids all day! When they are grown I will sleep...right?

elaine said...

well... I take drugs (SleepMD... which is an herbal sleep aid found at Walgreens).
With the Lupus... I really thrive on 8-10hrs of sleep per night... am really "ugly" otherwise.

On an aside... I really love your photos...

Midlantic ice queen said...

Lack of sleep will kill us. Seriously. This is one of the best POSITIVE reasons for decriminalizing drugs I can think of!